Wolf vs Sheep by Hugh Macleod

I wanted to share this cartoon that i have held onto for awhile now. Well i have held onto it mentally, i have yet to buy one of Hugh’s pieces, mainly b/c i’m a cheap ass.
but with that out of the way, i just wanted to say how much i really enjoyed his book Ignore Everybody.
i felt like he was writing specifically to me. and besides that, i go back to this book often just to get inspiried.
this cartoon (below) probably raps up my life, esp these last few years, more than anything else i have come across.

figuring out God

i have to believe that there is a god
and i can’t pass over the life of jesus and ignore it
he clearly spit time in two.
but that doesn’t mean that i care to have him figured out
i kinda of enjoy the mystery behind it all
i don’t want to believe b/c i know,
i want to believe b/c i believe

I don’t understand God
all i know is that he does what he wants
when he wants
and how he wants

sometimes i think
of our infatuation with understanding Him,
as being equated to that asst manager or overqualified employee
that kisses the ass of the ceo or manager,
in an effort to get his attention and affection

but isn’t that the guy that always gets fired, and not promoted?
after all he is the one that has bugged the hell out of his boss
and everyone else has seen straight through the guy
and been dreaming of seeing him getting layed off

i’m only guessing, i’ve never worked in corporate america.

may i?

may i apologize to the rest of the world for this strange, so very strange, religion named christianity?
please do not confuse it with christ, as he is only an idol in the religion but outside of it a reality.

Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious

{from myoneword.org}

This may not even make it through the email filter, but I swear I have a meaning behind this word.

In Mere Christianity, C.S. Lewis says “And if what we are matters even more than what we do-if, indeed, what we do matters chiefly as evidence of what we are-then it follows that the change which i most need to undergo is a change that my own direct, voluntary efforts cannot bring about”

And I think that is the only way I can explain my extremely random word. That is to say, that in the past, I would have chosen a really important word that I could “work” on for the following year.
However, after trying that for a long time, I finally gave up on changing myself.

Lewis also puts it like this:
“After the first few steps in the Christian life, we realize that everything which really needs to be done in our souls can be done only by God”

My one word doesn’t exemplify moving forward but backward.
Which really doesn’t settle well with most of us in our current Christian culture, but for me it is the only option.

Once again, Lewis puts it this way:
“Christ says ‘Give me All. I don’t want so much of your work: I want You. I have not come to torment your natural self, but to kill it.”

These are just a few of my favorite quotes but hopefully they help to describe why I chose such a strange word.
I feel like Christ is calling us, myself included, to come and die. To lay down our desires, wants, even our efforts to be good.
All of this so that he may become our life.
And I get the idea that as we drink of His life, then the two will merge, become one, like in a marriage.
And the effort that we used to exert, will fade away, as our focus becomes not our own effort, but Christ.
And suddenly, we will be changed from the inside out.
Our desires will change and our outlook will change.

It may not be what I want and it may be out of my control, but moving forward and allowing him to have his way, will surely be a Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious kind of life.

break free

Break Free (6-16-06) Lyrics
Artist(Band):Dave Matthews Band and Dave Matthews
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She is a wicked ride
Yes she is
She said I’m gonna make you climb right out yourself
She said now break free
You might have to give up your life
But I was thinking
I’d love to get inside you

I drink your poison if you fill the cup
You make me crazy, baby, don’t let up
But if I’m falling I don’t wanna stop
I’d give up everything to have your love
I drink your poison if you fill the cup
I’d drink your tears, don’t you cry, cry, cry, cry

She is a wicked high
Yes she is
She goes down so hard
She might never come back
She’s gonna break free
But she loves to laugh
But I was thinking
I’d love to get some of that

I drink your poison if you fill the cup
You make me crazy, baby, don’t let up
But if I’m falling I don’t wanna stop
I’d give up everything to have your love
I drink your poison if you fill the cup
I’d drink your tears, don’t you cry, cry, cry, cry

She’s so
She’s gonna break free
She’s gonna laugh
She’s gonna break free
Aww, she’s gonna break free
Aww, well that’s alright by me
Yeah, yeah

I drink your poison if you fill the cup
You make me crazy, baby, don’t let up
But if I’m falling I don’t wanna stop
I’d give up everything to have your love
I drink your poison if you fill the cup
I’d drink your tears, don’t you cry, cry, cry, cry

But the way she does me
The she hates to love me
If you fill the cup, I’ll drink you up, baby

I drink your poison if you fill the cup
You make me crazy, baby, don’t let up
And if I’m falling I don’t wanna stop
I’d give up everything to have your love
I drink your poison if you fill the cup
I’d drink your tears

Yes, I’m gonna rain
She don’t need me
She don’t need anything
Aww yeah
She gonna leave
She gonna ride the soul, soul, soul, ride

She gonna
She’ll ride the sunshine
Aww, she gonna break free
Gonna break out of here
Gonna

Aww yeah

My friend Jeremy

A friend of mine, Jeremy, told me the greatest story this week.
I met him for the first time on Tuesday and we connected from the start.
Turns out that he had a very troubled childhood.
For the first 9 and a half years of his life, he never was able to go outside.
His family lived in a small apartment in Chicago on the 15th floor.
This was a time when Chicago was in even worst shape than it is now.
Going outside of the apartment was a risk that could cost your life.

His father who was very controlling and abusive, demanded that Jeremy stay in his room (a former walk in closet)
There were no windows and the only light was from an artificial source, but it was bright enough for his needs.
His dad demanded that Jeremy stay in his room at all times with the door shut.
The only access to the outside was by Jeremy’s dad, who would go to work everyday.
He would explain to Jeremy everything that he needed to know about the outside world in terms that he could understand.
Overall the tone was negative but there were some explanations of the sun or sky, but even those were explained to be harmful in case of too much exposure, so the overall explanation was that the closet was the safest environment.

Jeremy could only be fed at times deemed appropriate by his dad, which were most of the times pretty standard, 7am, 12pm, and 5pm.
But sometimes his dad would give him extra or starve him a little, just to drive the point home, that all food came from him.
He would give him a few broken toy cars to play with and some cassette tapes (that his dad deemed appropriate) to enjoy sometimes, but his dad was always reiterating his authority over Jeremy.
Jeremy was never to question it or it may mean that he has to go outside (and his dad had told him the risk of doing that)
So, easy enough to say, Jeremy never did question it and seemed for the most part satisfied living in an old walk-in closet.

I know this is probably making you sad or angry but you have to understand that this is the only thing that Jeremy’s father ever knew.
It was the same lifestyle that his dad gave to him. It may seem like abuse to you but know that Jeremy doesn’t remember it being abusive, never any sexual abuse or verbal abuse, it was actually a pretty safe environment that his dad set up for him.
It was very consistent and safe. And as long as Jeremy didn’t question it, he was able to enjoy it and get fed.

As I said, this lasted for almost 10 years before something terrible happened.
Jeremy’s father, would leave about 8am everyday to go work at a local garage.
He would come home and feed Jeremy at lunch then head back out.
He would be home by 5pm.
He was very prompt about his times and found much joy in being on time.
But this time he didn’t come home.
Jeremy knew something was wrong, when even 5 minutes had past, and he didn’t see his dad.

Jeremy didn’t know what to do.
He knew that this required him to leave his room and venture outside, but this put him in a very special situation.
He had never been outside and didn’t know how to get there.
And what would happen if he went outside and his dad found him there? This would cost his life!
So Jeremy made the safest choice and stayed in his closet, hoping that his dad was just running late.

So he stayed in the closet for a few hours.
Hours turned into days, and days turned into a week.
A week with no food and just a little kool-aid from a moldy cup.

Jeremy was distraught, realizing that his father would never come home.
He had no choice but to go outside to find food.
His hunger had lead to him breaking all the rules to find food and freedom.
He walked out of the room and made his way to the outside.

Needless to say, Jeremy was overwhelmed with the outside.
His initial journey to find his dad, was sidetracked by his enjoyment in the sun.
Turns out the outside was really not that bad.
Jeremy actually lived across the street from a newly developed park.
He spent the entire day on the slides, and the swings, or just laying in the grass.
The sun felt so good.
He found himself so lost in the enjoyment, that he forgot about his hunger….and his dad.

Well to make a long story short, Jeremy eventually found a foster family that lived in the same apartment building.
They took good care of him and allowed him to play outside anytime he wanted.
Soon after Jeremy made a recovery, he made the decision to find and help others who were living in closets.

But the problem was that they were so hard to find.
You didn’t know who they were unless you broke into homes.
The only way you could access them is to talk to dads.
And of course dads were not going to tell!
He tried to yell in the streets about the freedom of being outside, but people didn’t want to listen.
They threw cans at him and told him to shut up.
They wanted to enjoy their life indoors and be left alone, after all that is where it was secure.

Jeremy decided that all he could do is just continue to enjoy the outside.
So he did, he rolled in the grass and laughed.
Slid down the slides and hung on the monkey bars.
It was fun to see the people that he met on the playground.
They were attracted to his joy and wanted to play with him.
One of his best friends were Cynthia who liked to play in the flowers, she was a real hippie.
He also met a friend Ben, who liked to play with face paint.
Danny, just sat in the grass and stared in the sun.
Cathy drove a VW and would bring everybody bread.
Doris liked to play in the street with balls and roller skate.
Steve was always playing with electronics.
Phillip talked to others and tried to figure them out.
Merry (a foreign exchange student from Africa) spoke afrikans and no one could understand her.
Barbara would bring band aids in case kids fell off the slide.
Janis would just give all the dads a hard time.
Andy was just glad to be outside.
Lauren and Hayley sang.
Wendy and Lisa took everybody’s money and helped people who needed help.
Hannah spoke to all the hispanic kids.
Roxanna started a rock band.
Frank fixed the bicycles.
Pat prayed for all the kids.
Tom told everybody to get back inside.
Kevin ate the bark.

Well that was almost 30 years ago and Jeremy is doing fine now.
He has a wife and 5 kids, all whom enjoy the outside more than Jeremy.

Kevin 😉

a different view

reject normal at all cost
who wants normal?
that is boring and lame
40+ hrs a week, tired, worn out, good for nobody and nothing but church (where your duty is never done)

i can’t do normal, i tried, they through me out
he came to show us a better way

quit saving the system
let the cards faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaalllllllllllllllllllllllllllll

random post

it wasn’t the unrighteous that killed jesus but the righteous
it wasn’t the sinners but the saints
do we have it upside down?
did he come for the righteous or the unrighteous
shall i boast in my weakness?
thank God i’m a sinner!

winter=blogging

winter=blogging
i love this time of year, so let me think….
i always get inspired after lunch
so what we see is that we are made complete in Him
well if we believe that and we are in fact the church, and our daily life is our tithe and small group is any group of believers…well what does that say about our meeting together in a strucured sense?
does it do more harm than good?
does it actually allow us to disregard all other times of ministry throughout the week?
when we are moving forward in our control then we disregard the work being done now
what if next sunday never comes?
what if small group is cancelled?
what shall we do now? ministry happens all of the time, not in a segmented time of the week.
to do this and accept this segmented mentality is to fall back and separate the secular from the sacred, jesus is not very cool about doing this i don’t think
i think we miss a lot in life when we do this

complete in Him

if we are made complete in Him, what is there left to study?
where does strife come from?
what else is there to know when we really know Him?
is it ok to feel complete?